We're nearing the end of garden season here in New England, but I picked some more metaphorical late-blooming flowers today and plopped them in a vase!
I still have much to learn from Amanda Evanston about the art of floral arranging, late bloomer that I am myself.
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Heading Off Into a Day Packed With Appointments 5 x 7"; acrylic, ink, fabric ink, oil pastel, and collage on paper abstract floral 2022 |
Made eight energetic bursts off the starting blocks yesterday, and now the first one has zipped around the track to cross the finish line! Had fun running!
Fleet of foot, light of heart, barely winded.
Basic art supplies, scraps, and scribbles.
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Daddy's Flannel Shirt, Mommy's Nightgown, and Meg's Tatutina Tee Shirt 5 x 7"; acrylic, ink, oil pastel, and collage on paper abstract floral 2022 |
My prayer this morning: I need to be in the presence of someone who paints freely and from within without fuss, finick, or fancy-pants preciousness.
Answer: Amanda Evanston shows up in my inbox with a Free Painting Class for Awesome People! by early afternoon. Holy moly!
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| tape and gesso on a sketchbook page |
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| color |
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| more color |
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| 8 starts |
I have a 9 x 12" Cachet sketchbook. No memory of when or why I purchased it. I can see that I filled about 5 of its pale gray pages with notes and thought exercises two and a half years ago following the lead of an artist I'd discovered online. I don't think I purchased the sketchbook for that purpose, though, and I jumped ship on those exercises in less than a week.
Starting in July of this year, I began painting in the sketchbook.
I like painting in a sketchbook currently; I like having the work become a spiral-bound visual diary. I feel a little more experimental and exploratory painting in a sketchbook than on stand-alone substrates.
Though not experimental and exploratory enough, asserts an inner voice.
Enough that I am wildly unsteady on my feet, I retort.
Perfect.
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working title: She Wobbles on Shoes With Tall Heels 9 x 12"; acrylic, ink, oil pastels, and watercolor chalks on paper abstract floral 2022 |
I notice what catches my attention today.
These words:
To fall into that
which is unidentified,
untethered,
undefined by phenomena,
for one brief moment,
allows the possibility
of knowing—
that knowing
that is already inside you—
knowing that which you are
as awareness,
open awareness
prior to the arising
of phenomena,
prior to the arising
of identity.
It’s in this that you see clearly.
You see beyond opinion,
position taking,
narrative.
You see beyond the matrix
of conditioning,
the matrix of the world.
—Amoda Maa
I notice what art catches my eye as I scroll through a feed online.
The logjam inside me breaks up and I begin making marks and changes on my previously-dubbed 'work in progress paralysis.'
Grateful for movement!
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work in progress |
I painted this 'chaos layer' on a page in my sketchbook with freedom and delight a couple of weeks ago.
Since then so much topsy-turvy going on here, what with Dave's knee surgery and challenging ongoing recovery, Caroline's being here and then not being here, driveway's being dug up for repaving, front entry and stairway's being painted and prepped for eventual wallpaper, carpeting's being installed, fall tutorial schedule's starting up, and driveway's getting its base coat put in place.
But, seriously, all of that is nothing.
It is piffle.
What's really going on is my own inner paralysis. I notice my hesitation, my resistance to the possibility of not 'liking' whatever I do next. I can't seem to get out of my own way.
And that is all I have to say!
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work in 9 x 12" on paper |
The word tumult comes to mind, so I look it up. Top definition refers to loud confused noise. Nope, that's not what I'm looking for. Second definition references confusion and disorder. Closer, but not really on target. I look next at chaos. In a state of complete confusion and disorder.
Hmm, what's the word for partial confusion and disorder? What's the suffix that would indicate of or pertaining to confusion and disorder? Tumultish? Chaotious?
My current internal and external circumstances feel confused and disordered but, in truth, they are not without some clarity and systems.
I can't find the precise word I want.
I feel ill-defined.
In any case, here's what emerges in stolen moments over the course of at least two weeks when I open my sketchbook and put art supplies of one sort or another into my hands.
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Even If You Was Made to Do Bad Stuff, You Don't Have to For Ever 9 x 12"; acrylic, watercolor, ink, oil pastel, and collage on paper abstract 2022 |
